UK - Arranged marriages

This is wrong on so many levels.

The story begins here where a British born Bangladeshi Muslim woman living in Oldham, sets the scene.

LET me first introduce myself before I bombard you with the little details of my life that has so far spiralled out of control and now I have found myself married to a man who does not speak English, who I don't really fancy and who is expected to arrive in the UK in the next couple of weeks!

My name is Rujina Begum. My friends call me Ruji for short. I am a British born Bangladeshi Muslim, living in Oldham.

I am 23 years old and work in PR in Manchester and oh yes I, a well educated modern girl - who always dreamed of marrying a prince riding up in white horse - recently changed my mind and had an arranged marriage in Sylhet, Bangladesh.

Why do you ask did I go and do something crazy like that I hear you say?

Well it’s quite simple, my ex boyfriend decided that he will marry his cousin instead - if three years of being together didn’t mean anything to him then that was fine by me!

But it left me with a broken heart and what better way to mend this broken heart but to get married before he did! Finding a good looking husband from the Greater Manchester region was taking too long.

Ruji is obviously not as well educated as she thinks she is.

She ends her introduction with this.

But anyway that sums me up for the time being - and you'll be hearing from me a lot more as I spend the first couple of months trying to adjust to married life with da husband from Bangladesh who doesn’t speak English and who I don’t fancy!!!

Well Ruji, let's hope you don't end up dead from a so called "honour murder". One things for sure, the minute your new husband arrives we, the tax payer, start paying for your little adventure.

The story continues here and already things aren't looking too good.

Who knows I may even grow to fancy him and he can go and learn English so that I can take him out to meet my friends and we can go to the various parties I get involved in and he communicate with my colleagues - I hope.

Yeah Ruji, who knows, maybe he can go and learn English so he can, you know, get a job and try and integrate into British society. But if you're anything to go by there's not much hope of that. Read on as Ruji relates her nonchalant attitude to marrying a man who doesn't speak English and doesn't even know. Note how there's a hint of bigotry.

I couldn't let my parents down either - though my dad seemed more keen on the match than my mum - she had a problem with short Bengali men - she said they were always up to no good!

What? All Bengali men or just the short ones? It's not just her parents either, just listen as her friends tell her to hide his passport, not disclose her finances and not introduce him to her friends.

In the end Ruji senses everything is not right but she can't just put her finger on what's wrong.

I was off to a great start here - basically I have been told not to trust the guy - but if that was the case why on earth did everyone encourage me when I said I was going to go back "home" to get married. At the time I was told it was the best decision that I had made - I was desperate to get over my ex but at the same time I was a little thrilled - it was a little flutter of excitement in my stomach and that was all. But the signs of encouragement from the very same people that were now telling me to be on my guard was quite disturbing.

Well duh, Ruji, everyone was just glad you were going home to get married. You know, as opposed to marrying an infidel here.

Ruji's last post was on 25 October were she states her new husband will arrive that weekend, the 28th. That was nearly a month ago and no word since. O Dear.